Willpower

Willpower — page 5 — that were newer than your dad’s car I’ve seen dinosaurs that are younger than your car I rubbed the coin so hard I thought I’d scratch the etched date on it right off Jennifer Dad said remember Meet back here at three thirty I’ll be waiting I turned to face my dad The brim of his dirty baseball cap cast a shadow over his tired face His eyes had dark circles under them and his scruffy beard still had the remains of breakfast in it Or was it last night’s dinner I couldn’t tell I checked myself out in the mirror in the sun visor I didn’t look much better My hair was straggly I hadn’t showered in a couple of days and my face was the map of a country I called Zitistan I tried to smooth out my hair with my hand but it felt greasy under my fingers Do you have to pick me up here I asked I could meet you a block over There’s less traffic down there 4

Willpower — page 6 — No he said We have to act normal Pop normal right now Normal We were the furthest thing from Dad how about you pick me up at four Most parents will have picked up their kids and there won’t be anyone around I can hang out in the school library until you show up No he said Be here at three thirty Why I asked You know why Jennifer he said Silence I stared out the window as the van lurched ahead Rattle Pop Finally Dad spoke again I don’t want you to do anything out of the ordinary Don’t bring any attention to yourself Please I wanted to point out that the van was doing a fine job of that But I kept that comment to myself Yes Dad I mumbled 5

Willpower — page 7 — can buy something healthy from the No side trips No talking to anyone Be right here at three thirty he said Don’t be late I rolled my eyes Yeah yeah yeah I know the drill Dad Trust me I won’t be late He reached down to the passenger seat and held up a tied grocery bag by its handles Don’t forget your lunch I stared at the plastic bag Isn’t the junker van bad enough Most kids if they didn’t buy their lunch in the cafeteria had cool lunch bags I just got a recycled bag from Walmart I waved it off I cafeteria I said Just give me five bucks He shook his head and said We don’t have the money to spare Take it Jennifer I glared at Dad I began to spin the silver dollar on the palm of my hand Then I’ll go without I said I’m not that hungry Jennifer you need to eat Dad said No arguments 6

Willpower — page 8 — I’ll be fine I said You’re going to need your strength today he said holding the bag in front of me I didn’t budge I don’t want anything to happen like last time Dad said Please take it You know you have to eat I hated that he treated me like a kid I gripped the coin and spun it again on the palm of my hand Fine I finally said grabbing the bag from his hand I’m sorry Jennifer but I’m looking out for you We have to be careful right now Please don’t do anything to bring attention to yourself I ignored him as I watched the coin spinning It kept turning and turning until it began to float up from my palm The silver dollar spun faster as it rose Higher and higher I started to breathe harder as I watched the coin floating in the air Dad snatched the silver dollar out of the air And definitely do not do that he said 7

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